They say no two babies are the same, and no two births are the same either.
So far the saying has certainly rung true for us: BB and Little B couldnโt be more different, and nor could the way they entered the world.
The trouble is, Iโd like baby number three to arrive in exactly the same way Little B did. And I know the chances are they probably wonโt.
The trouble with the โperfectโ birth
With d-day now imminent Iโve decided not to write a birth plan, mainly because of BBโs birth in 2011 which was, quite frankly, horrendous.
She was two weeks late and I was induced on the 15th day, which led to one intervention after another and not the sort of labour or birth Iโd hoped for at all.
When Little B came along three years later I was determined things would be different: I had regular reflexology, including a session on my due date to try and induce things naturally, and I did pregnancy yoga in a bid to master breathing techniques that might mean I could have a drug-free labour and birth.
And it all went according to plan. Within 48 hours of my last reflexology session my waters broke, within 12 hours of that labour was firmly established and just a few hours later I had the water birth Iโd always wanted with no drugs or gas and air at all.
All in all, it was the โperfectโ birth. But the trouble with the ‘perfect’ birth is thatย I’d likeย the same thing to happen again, andย Iโm worried that it wonโt.
Of course there’s nothing for it but to go with the flow – and all I can say at the time of writing (that’s 39 weeks andย 6 days pregnant)ย is watch this space…
Have you had more than one baby and were their births totally different or quite similar? Iโd love to hear about your experience!
Linking up withโฆ
I’ve only had one baby so have nothing to compare my strange and quite frankly dramatic birthing experience with, however, a good friend of mine recently had her second baby and that birth could not have been more different. Very quick the second time around as opposed to a very long labour the first time around! #postsfromtheheart
They do say they get quicker…
I was just like you and didn’t write a birth plan after my first, I just went with the flow #MarvMondays
That’s my plan too…
I had a water birth with my second. It was much more comfortable and calmer than when I had my second. If had another I’d want it to go that way too – if only I could choose!
#MarvMondays
Yes me too – fingers crossed!
I had two inductions but they were both pretty perfect – I went into labour 24 hours after pessary with Biggest and he was born 4 hours later with no pain meds or further intervention. I went into labour 24 hours after pessary with Littlest and had an active labour of 20 minutes! I literally woke up, was checked and she was born an hour later. So inductions don’t have to be bad things. I think the most important thing is just to accept that there is no right way and as long as the little one arrives safe and sound, that is the perfect labour! #postfromtheheart
I’m pleased to hear this as I’ve never heard a ‘good’ induction story before! Thanks for sharing x
Both mine were overdue, my first blessed me with 31 hours active labour. Apparently I was delirious, dehydrated and rambling. My daughter eventually arrived aided by forceps.
My second was 2 weeks late, I was induced but the pessary fell out, luckily I was dilated enough they could break my waters. I was fully expecting it to take a huge amount of time again so when six hours later the midwife said “One more push and baby will be here”
I literally said “What the…What do you mean one more push? Already?” I was quite surprised!
I hope yours is a good labour and littlest is here soon ๐ #postsfromtheheart
Wow what an experience! I remember being surprised how quickly Little B arrived too…
Every birth is so different and I’ve never seen the point in having a birth plan as you just don’t know how it’s going to go and how you’ll feel. My first birth was 13 hours I think and not too bad, the next was delayed as much as poss as I was 25 weeks and then Pops was almost surreal. I think I barely opened my eyes or spoke I was too focused! Here’s hoping you have a nice easy birth and I know before long you’ll be linking up your arrival news!! Eeek!! Thanks for joining us as always for #marvmondays xx
Thank you – I hope so!
I was with you for the no birth plan. Both my first and second were really similar in terms of both water and no intervention but the second was soooo much faster. I have a feeling your third will be similar to your second, just quicker!! Exciting and I really hope another good one for you xx #mravmondays
Thank you – the midwife says third babies can be a bit of an anomaly so we’ll have to see!
This is so so true, there really is no way of knowing without it all beginning, so a positive, open mind is one of the only things you can aim for! #twinklytuesday
I do think it’s a case of mind over matter and if you believe you can do it then you will…
My two births were very different!
With my daughter (three years old now), she had to be induced early and the labour was around 7 hours from first contraction to birth. I gave birth to her in a busy, understaffed hospital and the midwives would disappear for ages at a time, including at the crucial moment when pushing started! I had an episiotomy and was in shock for quite a while afterwards.
My son was born 8 weeks ago and I had an incredibly long, three-day-long stop start labour, going back and forth from our local, smaller hospital. My waters broke at home and from the last arrival at the hospital to birth was 41 minutes apparently! I gave birth in a pool and the midwives couldn’t have been kinder to me. They really empowered me to have the birth I wanted. Although it wasn’t perfect (second degree tear!) I treasure the memory of it because I felt so well cared for.
My son was also well over a pound bigger than my daughter was … with a rather large head! ๐
I guess there’s no telling how each labour will be, as you say x #twinklytuesday
They sound like very different experiences! I loved my water birth last time and really hope for that again…
I have only had the one so cant compare, if we had another i wouldn’t write a birth plan and would hope that it would go different to Olivia’s.
Well parts of it as it wasn’t all bad.
I guess it’s six of one and half a dozen of the other sometimes!
I have no desire for a birth plan… if my birth doesn’t go to plan it will just annoy me.lol. Am currently 35 weeks 4 days and braxton hicks are kicking up a lot. Was induced for my first after my waters broke and he was born bang on 35 weeks after a really calm labour with an epidural. Have never been this pregnant before or had to wait for spontaneous labour so am literally winging it. I don’t know if I will be so lucky to have a chilled birth this time… I just hope so! Sending you a big hug xxx #twinklytuesday
Fingers crossed for you – good luck too!x
My birth was horrible. If we ever decide to have anymore I will definitely do more labour prep. I recon I would have benefited greatly from pregnancy yoga. You never know you might have mastered the fine art of perfect labours. Fingers crossed this next one will be a breeze! #twinklytuesday
I do think yoga makes a difference – if you get the breathing right it can help immensely x
Not only were my two births very different but my pregnancies, too.
I sailed thru my first pregnancy, skipping along in heels and leggins until my due date. The birth was very long, very slow and very very painful. 32 hours later my daughter made an arrival,
My son was the complete opposite; terrible pregnancy, sick for the first 5 months and looking like a ballooning whale but birth was over – from first contractions to finish – in just under 4 hours!
Best of luck with your birth xx
#TalesFromTheHeart
Sounds very similar to my two experiences too – it’s funny how they can all be so different…
I only have one child, and am nowhere near having a second, but I can relate to this. I managed to avoid most of the intervention I didn’t want with my first birth (I was banned from the birthing centre and pool because of my waters breaking early and had to have the syntocin drip because I was progressing ‘too slowly’, but I avoided the epidural they tried to make me have), and next time I really want the water birth I missed out on. I’m scared the same thing would happen again and I’ll be strapped to the monitor for 14 hours again.
I hope you get the birth you want. #BestandWorst
If it’s any consolation my first birth was like your first but the second was totally natural & everything I’d hoped for – fingers crossed you get the birth you want too!
My mummy can totally relate to this. She was lucky the first time round and had a short labour and a water birth with no pain relief…it was almost text book! The next time around I’m sure wouldn’t be so easy!! #MarvMondays #TwinklyTuesday
That’s what I had last time too – sooo want the same again!
I had two very different labours. My 1st which was 12 hours and an epidural & assisted. My 2nd was 2 hours and gas and air! I never wrote a birth plan with either as I learnt from the first that you just don’t know what you’ll feel until you’re there! x
Your two experiences sound similar to mine, minus the gas & air. I hated that – it made me feel awful so after a few puffs I let Misery Guts use it instead!!
Having had five births, all of mine were very different in some ways and very similar in others. With all five I went from 4cm to birth in just a couple of minutes, although getting to 4cm was very different with each baby! I ranged from 10 minutes to 35 hours, had one naturally and four inductions. I didn’t make a birth plan with any of my five, I just knew I didn’t want an epidural and that I wanted the baby handed straight to me! #TwinklyTuesday
You’re a real pro! I went from a few cms to ready to push very quickly last time too – I just hope I don’t have to be induced…
I wasn’t really sure what to expect from labour. My baby stopped growing however and they booked me in for an induction. However my little one clearly didn’t want to be induced (and neither did I) and my waters broke the day before. From my waters breaking to me holding him in my arms was a total of 3 hours and 20 minutes. My concern is how quick the next one might be. He was also over two weeks early, I have paranoia that I am going to go into labour and give birth in Tesco!! #postsfromtheheart
Goodness that is a quick labour! My last one was very quick too – but not that quick!!
I definitely think the best attitude to have is to go with the flow. My problem with a birth ‘plan’ is that you can’t plan it! I prefer birth ‘preferences’! I had an emergency section with first and elective section with second. Although surgery involved both times, both were very different.
Good luck, hope you haven’t too much longer to wait x
#PostFromTheHeart
I totally agree – preferences is a good word!
I was adamant I wanted the whole drug free waterbirth experience with my first but he ended up breech with low fluid and I was booked in for a csection at 39 weeks. I always thought with my second I’d try for the natural route again but when the time came I had an irrational fear that if I went for vbac something terrible would happen (strangely hubby had the same fear) so went the elective route. Turns out my previous scar was already starting to rupture when they opened me up so thank god I listened to my gut. I’ve been advised not to have any more after that experience so I never will get the waterbirth I always wanted but I’ve made my peace with it now, at the end of the day all that really matters is that you have a healthy baby at the end of it. I’m keeping my fingers crossed for you x
#Bestandworst
That’s such a shame but the main thing is they both arrived safely & healthy…
Still waiting where is the baby??……#dontkillme ๐ Thanks for sharing with #bestandworst x
I wish they’d hurry up!!
My labour with Harry was 12 hours end to end and relatively straight forward Charley -Rose took 3 slow days to make an appearance and I was so exhausted I struggled with the birth. I did however have a full water birth & no drugs but truthfully it was enough to put me off for life . Good luck #postsfromtheheart
Oh no! Wish I hadnโt read this!
Oh good luck!!! I’ve only had one but I too had reflexology and went into labour naturally and with just gas and air. It was t perfect as we had meconium and I had to be monitored so couldn’t get the water birth I wanted. I think all I would do is try the same prep is reflexology next time, and hope for the best! Good luck!! Can’t wait o hear all about it xx #TwinklyTuesday
I’ve had two reflexology sessions now and…nothing!