It’s been almost five months since we welcomed baby number four Violet Hope and I thought now would be a good time for a little update.
One of the things I get asked the most since becoming a family of six is how we’re getting on – and with the older three back at school and nursery after lockdown I can confirm things have got a lot easier!
That said, it’s fair to say life is hectic and there are certain things it’s probably worth thinking about before having a fourth baby.
So, if you’re umming and ahhing about adding to your brood I thought it would be fun to share 10 things to consider before having a fourth baby.
10 things to consider before having a fourth baby
1. Space
I may be stating the obvious, but you’re going to need to think about space – or lack of it. I’m a firm believer that children don’t need bedrooms of their own (we live in a two bedroom flat with four kids) and while five bedrooms would be fantastic, I don’t think it’s a necessity. It’s what you do with the space you’ve got that counts (see clever ways to fit 3 kids in one bedroom).
2. The car
There’s no getting away from it, unless you’re happy to strap one of them to the roof (which is tempting at times) you’re going to need a car that seats at least six people. Especially if they’re all still in car seats. And don’t forget the pram. And the scooters. And the bikes.
3. The washing
I vividly remember a friend telling me I wouldn’t see the bottom of our dirty laundry basket again when we announced we were expecting baby number three, and she was absolutely right. I shudder to think what’s lurking at the bottom of ours – I genuinely have no idea! And the sooner you accept that the washing is never ending, the better.
4. There’s no such thing as a ‘family ticket’
Or not for a family of six, anyway. Prepare to pay through the nose for everything – and be bitterly disappointed if it turns out not to be worth the cash.
5. Holidays
There’s no such thing as a cheap holiday, either. Unless you count staying at home, which isn’t the same thing. You could also say there’s no such thing as a holiday per se – at least when they’re little, anyway!
6. Childcare
Remember all those people who offered to help out when baby number one and baby number two arrived? They go suddenly quiet because nobody in their right mind would offer to take four kids off your hands – and who can blame them!
7. Unsolicited advice
People love to give you unsolicited advice, especially strangers. Just remember that unless they’ve got three or more children, they’re simply not qualified. Ignore at all costs.
8. People will state the obvious – a lot
‘You’ve got your hands full’ and ‘don’t you have a TV?’ – prepare to smile politely and grit your teeth.
9. Food
I honestly don’t know where it goes. Bread, crisps and biscuits can disappear in the blink of an eye, and as for cereal and milk – it’s like feeding the five thousand.
10. The noise
Life is organised chaos. Or disorganised chaos, if you happen to be having a bad day – which is quite often in our house! If you can’t zone out of the noise and the bickering and the squabbling and the mess and the constant ‘Mum Mum Mum Mum Muuuuum‘ having four kids probably isn’t for you. But if you can embrace the noise and the bickering and the squabbling and the mess and the constant ‘Mum Mum Mum Mum Muuuuum‘ and rise above it to the four little humans who make you laugh and fill your heart with joy every single day then you’ll be just fine!
I remember having to get a larger car to accommadate my 3rd and then 4th child #kcacols@_karendennis
haha, I can totally relate to this being a Mum of 5. I did have a 16 year gap between no2 and no3 though. We had a three bedroom house which was fine with sharing at first. But then the kids got bigger and the house got smaller and we had to move. My eldest two are still at home and everyone would comment how great we had built in babysitters…err yes, one is autistic and the other works all the time. Not so fantastic. We don’t have a big car (well we do at the moment but it’s a courtesy car while ours is being fixed, all they had to loan us was an 8 seater. which is a damn shame because we have never been able to all go in the car together before, and now we can’t because of this stupid virus and my vulnerablity.) I agree 100% on the laundry, food, tickets and holidays. The noise isn’t so bad now they are older, so there will be peace one day π
Hahaha great post! Can’t imagine having four – I struggle with two haha! Supermum π xx #dreamteam
This is such a useful post. We considered having a third child for years – and then decided not to – for some of the reasons you’ve stated above. You have a beautiful family x #KCACOLS
I love this! And I literally don’t know how you do it! #KCACOLS
It sounds amazing having so many little ones around you – and whilst we are in the opposite situation with just the 1, I can completely understand what you mean in terms of space, cars, childcare, food and so on. #DreamTeamLinky xx
I want number 4 but hubby says ‘no’. I have accepted that but feel almost griefstricken. Even 3 kids means that lots of these factors need to be considered! Thanks for linking up with #dreamteaminky
Having my hands pretty full with just the one, having four children isn’t something I’ve ever seriously considered. But for anyone who is, these are great points to consider before hand x #KCACOLS