Does giving my baby a tablet make me a bad mum?
I don’t mean the medicinal kind of tablet, I mean the computer kind.
As a work at home mum tablets – along with, shock horror, the TV – are a vital part of my arsenal to get through the working day, especially in the school holidays.
Loaded with games and books and videos and puzzles they enable me to make that important phone call, deal with emails and concentrate on the latest feature I’m writing.
Yet everywhere you look as a parent there’s the notion screens are bad for kids, and the less they use them the better.
Does giving my baby a tablet make me a bad mum?
The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends no child under the age of 18 months old should be exposed to screens, and after that one hour of screen time a day up to the age of five is ok as long as it’s high quality programming and you’re watching it with them (as opposed to leaving them to it, like me).
I’m sorry, but one hour?? What planet are they on? My three use screens in various forms – their tablets, the TV, my phone – a lot longer than that. I think a reality check is needed here.
Interestingly, there are no such official guidelines in the UK, so does that make it ok that I let my 17-month-old, three-year-old and six-year-old loose with screens for waaay longer than that?
It’s not as though I’m handing them devices and letting them surf the internet until they get square eyes while I chat on the phone or paint my nails. I’m handing them devices with a piano function and matching games and nursery rhymes while I help earn the money to put the food on the table and keep a roof over their heads.
Surely being in their own home with me and our screens is better than the alternative: being in full time childcare with strangers and not seeing each other until tea time.
In fact the latter scenario would make life far easier for me – allowing me to concentrate on just my job instead of doing two jobs at the same time, which is essentially what work at home mums (and dads) do. But I don’t believe it would be better for the kids.
I honestly believe they’re better off at home with me, even if they are looking at screens for more than an hour a day. And even if that does mean some people think I’m a bad mum. Because any way to stay at home, right? At least I’m the one making their tea and wiping their bottoms and drying their eyes and giving them cuddles.
What do you think? Are screens really that bad for kids? Do your kids have tablets and how long do you let them use them for in a day? I’d love to know your thoughts!
If you liked this you may also enjoy reading:
10 reasons it’s ok to use TV as a babysitter
Surviving the school holidays without going batsh*t mental
How I make working from home with kids work
Linking up with these fabulous blogs!
My girls get 3 hours a day during the school holidays. My youngest rarely uses all of her time. She will find other things to do but my teen does and can do jobs around the house to earn extra time.
I think as long as what they are doing on their tablets is age appropriate and it is not effecting their sleep and day to day life let them be….There is no way you are a bad mum. #MMBC
My boys love the tablet (sdadly they smashed it on the first day of summer) however they have our temporary phone but they are limited because the youngest goes in zombie mode and the eldest gets really angry and aggressive. It has helped them read and reconsider numbers and stuff so does have it benefits X #mmbc
Everything is good in moderation, and there are no guidelines for this brave new world! Sometimes, a tv show is needed to take a call, sometimes the ipad lets them learn math. Nothing is black and white. Great post! #dreamteam xoxo
this is the future, I feel horribly behind when it comes to technology and think that not teaching our kids how to use these things responsibly would be doing them a disservice. Like Lisa said, everything in moderation #dreamteam
It’s such a tricky one. There’s no point in saying zero tablets because technology is here to stay. They learn coding at school… so…. having tablets with educational games and so on is going to help at some point. We don’t really set a time limit for ours as she’s more interested in playing with her LOL dolls at the moment. But, like you, if work needs to be done, I wouldn’t say no to her jumping on her tablet for a while. Ps. you definitely are not a bad mum and… your my hero for being so open about tablet use (loads of people pretend they don’t even own one hehe). Thanks for joining us for the #dreamteam xx
Tablets certainly have their place in modern parenting. they weren’t really a thing when mine were young but I’d probably do it now. there are so many parenting controls these days and making technology second nature has to hold any youngster in good stead. #KCACOLS
I don’t think they are bad at all!! They’re a lifesaver for me and as you say they provide educational as well as entertainment value. I do feel guilty sometimes so I remind myself that I take them out for a few hours most days and they get a lot of my attention but sometimes I just have to work! #kcacols
ER…I’m a bit embarrassed to comment on this post because I do tend to use the electronics as a bit of a babysitter sometimes. G loves youtube and he’s on it for about half an hour every morning while I faff about with the other kids. My ten year old is limited to three hours, we have Google FamilyLink which is great for setting boundaries and keeping an eye on the older ones #KCACOLS
Our son gets a lot of screen time, and sometimes I feel I should manage to keep him off it more, but he does learn from it too, so it’s not all bad.
And as has already been said by others in the comments here, I think it’s about finding a balance, so that you have screen time AND ‘green time’, and learn to make things yourself IRL as well as using tech, and so on.
It’s a bit of a tricky issue so thank you and well-done for writing so frankly about it!
#MMBC
We’ve always been reasonably relaxed about screen time with our 8yo. In the holidays in particular, when she’s been out of the house at the childminder for half the day, we tend to pop the tv on or she goes on the ipad. But because we’re relaxed about it, she doesn’t hanker after it. And she does tons of reading and playing too. #kcacols
Personally I can’t stand it, and our 2 year old has only just begun to watch those annoying kids’ programmes (cough, Peppa Pig, cough). Annoyingly it wasn’t us that introduced it but her childminder, and she’s now obsessed. I don’t mind screen time as long as it’s something engaging and actually half decent. One Peppa episode she watched the other day called daddy pig a “vegetable” because he was sat watching tv… oh the irony! At the end of the day it’s every parent’s choice if, when and for how long your child watches tv or plays games and I’ll admit that Peppa, as deplorable as she is, does allow me a 5 minute shower when I need it!
Thanks so much for linking up to #KCACOLS. Hope to see you again next time!
I’m with you on this one, both my children have a fair bit of screentime that allows me to get on with work while we’re all at home together. It’s all about balance though isn’t it, because we also do a fair bit of other stuff too, we play games, we go to the park, we read, we bake etc etc. x #KCACOLS