When was the last time you had a proper night’s sleep?
Last week? Last month? Last year?
It’s almost a year since baby number three joined us meaning it’s almost a year since I last had a decent night’s sleep.
What with exclusive breastfeeding, the night feeds and a threenager who doesn’t like sleep on average I’m up every two to three hours during the night, all night, every night.
It’s fair to say I’m currently functioning on Mombie mode, and even the most well-meaning comments tend to bring out the worst in me.
I’ve written before about 10 things you should never say to a pregnant woman, and here’s 10 things you should never say to a sleep deprived mum.
10 things you should never say to a sleep deprived mum
1. ‘You look tired’. Of course I’m bl**dy tired – I haven’t had a proper night’s sleep in aeons. Thanks for pointing it out.
2. ‘I’m sooo tired’. Apart from ending in a game of competitive tiredness, there’s nothing more infuriating than someone who isn’t a parent saying they’re tired. You might think you’re tired, but you’ve got noooo idea.
3. ‘My baby slept through the night at six weeks’. Well whoopee-do for you. You’re obviously an amazing parent, and I’m obviously not.
4. ‘My baby didn’t sleep through the night for three years’. Whaaat? You mean this could go on for YEARS?
5. ‘It gets easier’. No, it doesn’t get easier. It gets worse. Being woken every few hours throughout the night is one thing when you’re on maternity leave and all you have to do is get through the next day, but quite another when life has returned to normal and you’re back at work and you’re still being woken every few hours throughout the night. It’s even worse than when they were newborn.
6. ‘Have you tried sleeping when the baby sleeps?’ Oh yes, silly me, why didn’t I think of that? Because that’s easy peasy when you’ve got a full-time job, three kids and a husband who’s ultra-marathon training.
7. ‘Have you tried…’ Of course I have, I’m not stupid!
8. ‘They must be hungry’. Which is another way of saying switch to formula. They’re not hungry, they’re just not sleeping through the night yet.
9. ‘It will pass’. Will it? When when when?!
10. ‘My friend was so sleep deprived she actually started hallucinating’. Marvellous, thanks for that.
Are you a sleep deprived mum or dad? What drives you up the wall the most?
Linking up with these fabulous blogs!
This made me laugh out loud – then I felt immediately bad because it’s really no laughing matter. When my daughter wasn’t sleeping there was nothing anyone said that didn’t annoy me – nothing. x
Hahaha I can totally relate – you’re doing a fab job. The one I hate the most is “When I have a baby, I’ll sleep when the baby sleeps”. UH HUH YEAH GOOD LUCK WITH THAT ONE.
Lol
Oops, meant to say #TheListLinky too in there! Sorry…
8 years later and although our daughter sleeps through, I think “just you wait!” when someone without children tells me they’re tired..! #TheListLinky
I remember when my daughter was around a year old, I was generally up every 2 hours, some nights it was every half hour and I’m not sure that anything anyone said would have helped! Apart from chatting to my friend every day who was going through the same thing and who I could basically cry with every morning over how tired we were! x #TheListLinky
Oh my god this is so right. I remember boiling inside anytime anyone mentioned they were tired!
#TheListLinky
So true! My son is a terrible sleeper and every time a smug parent tells me their child sleeps 14 hours straight when I’ve told them I was up half the night with mine every day this week, I just want to scream. It’s really not helpful! I’m always mindful that when someone is complaining about something to me, they do not want me to talk about how easy I have it as a response! #KCACOLS
Yes to all of these, especially the “have you tried…”. As if I don’t have Google and haven’t spent hours and hours on it looking for the answers!! #KCACOLS
I want to find all the “experienced” mums who told me how much more time I was going to have and how much easier things would be when my kids were “older.” Now that I’ve got teens and young adults, I’m still staying up later than my middle aged bones really prefer so I can have time with them when they’re here, and getting up early to make breakfasts, say goodbye, and pack lunches. Honestly? It’s a joy, and I know that “this too shall pass,” (another great platitude!) and I don’t want to miss a moment with these great kids!
haha, I love the one, which my mum used to say all the time ‘sleep when the baby sleeps’ – easier said than done. As soon as I would nod of I was usually woken by her ringing me up! #KCACOLS
I have a nearly 7 week old baby. I’m up every 2/3 hours, sometimes less. We have a three year old too (but he sleeps great). Im finding the nights easier this time so i get people saying “you don’t look tired!” and I say “I’m not really!” but i don’t know why! Im waiting for it to hit me. #KCACOLS
I’m sure people don’t think before engaging their brains! Especially with comments like “my baby slept through from 6 weeks”….. bore off!! #twinklytuesday
Haha! So glad those days are behind me. But lately my sleep has been fitful. I think it has something to do with menopause.
Dang! And I thought you only go through this phase once!
#bloggersbest
People get on my bloody nerves. “My baby slept through the night at 6 weeks”. Whats want? A medal? #bloggersbest
The hallucinating comment?? OMG. Ah hope it gets better hun. Being tired just sucks!! Thanks for sharing with #bloggersbest x
Oh yes……number 2 without a doubt, erghhhh!!! They have nooo idea. Thanks for linking up to this weeks #BloggersBests
Love this! I’ve heard them all- drives me mad! Although maybe when our children sleep we will accidentally get revenge by saying to others! #bloggersbest
Love this! I’ve heard them all- drives me mad! Although maybe when our children sleep we will accidentally get revenge by saying to others! #bloggersbest
Ahh! Everyone is so full of advice when you are tired.
When they get to an age of sleeping through the night they give you things to worry about and you still don’t sleep. lol #bloggersbest
All things I’ve had said to me. Everyone is suddenly an expert. #kcacols
I sooo could have written this post! Being woken up every 2-3 hours was my life with little Eco when ebf and bedsharing with him. Once I weaned him from the boob aged 19 months my boob monster surprised me by sleeping through through. Of course he still has a few night wakings here and there depending if he is teething, unwell or just wants to be up singing nursery rhymes (laughs) but it has got better since I decided to wean him. That said I am currently expecting baby no 2 so bracing myself for being a sleep deprived mama all over again. #KCACOLS
So tough, plus I found breastfeeding so draining too! It does get better, took my third until she was 18 months old to get the idea but she now sleeps like a little star (most of the time!!) Thank you for linking up with #KCACOLS and we do hope you can join us again next time. Kate x
I can relate to all of these, particularly as my almost 4 year old still doesn’t sleep through most nights (weeps). I find that as well as the rubbish (yet well meaning!) advice, there’s always someone who’s had it worse, almost as though its a competition! Hope the sleep situation improves for you soon, thanks for linking up with #TwinklyTuesday x
Oh my goodness this is just where I was when my youngest was tiny. All those things were said to me and all of them wound me up! Sometimes there is just no need for “advice” #KCACOLS
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You are far politer than me! There is nothing you can say to a tired mama that is right. Just clean her kitchen and hold her baby while she drinks a cuppa and does whatever else she wants to do #KCACOLS
Err 9, sorry, never really did. Probably didn’t want to hear that though eh, sorry! If it helps it’s because my eldest two have autism and ADHD. Our little girl sleeps OK now (thank goodness, at least that’s one). Thanks so much for linking to #kcacols and hope to see you again next time.
Worst for me was the opposite of one on your list which was: you will never sleep again. Told to me by my midwife on day six. Not what I needed to hear and I can safely say completely untrue!
#KCACOLS
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